Settling in….

It has been a little over two weeks since I returned to the Netherlands.

A few days after my return I wrote; “moving abroad is scary, exciting and amazing, moving back is confusing….”

I have lived in Vancouver for about 6,5 months a lot happens in a period that long and I felt really changed. It is difficult to go on in the same energy once your back in to your old life, or at least that is what it feels like.

I lived in Vancouver which was pretty far away and I definitely lived my life there, I didn’t worry too much about what was going on here, basically I didn’t really know what was going on here. So I moved back as if no time had passed, it is difficult to explain, but basically what I’m saying is that I came back and for me it didn’t feel like any time at all had passed. I hadn’t seen people in a long time, but that goes for all people in my life in the same amount, what makes it feel like I just saw them 2 weeks ago, it just felt like I was different but my life was the same. And I have written about that before, my life the way it was the six months leading up to the Vancouver adventure wasn’t the life I wanted to return to.
It wasn’t a happy period for me and Vancouver was, the best time of my life in the best place on earth.

So I struggled a bit with that. In the beginning I felt like I had massively changed and didn’t fit in to my own life anymore, I have even felt ‘homesick’, for Vancouver... Also I didn’t really know how to fit in again and still go on in the same spirit and energy as I had in Vancouver. But in the end it turns out the changes are clear but way more subtle, and if you don’t overwhelm yourself it will be ok. You will find your place and figure out what it is that you want.

But the overwhelming part is what happened to me, a lot has happened in these past two weeks. To start off with the fact that I returned injured, I have been injured a lot before, but this one is different since it is my good leg. Since I was injured I wouldn’t have a ski season, I knew about that and had made peace with that, or so I thought. My injury also is responsible for the fact that I couldn’t start my medical clerkships, and that was difficult to grasp, because what to do with all that time I had to wait? I returned on a Monday night and I had my appointment with the orthopedic surgeon on Thursday morning, I was very nervous and somehow convinced that he would schedule me for surgery straight away. Having surgery meant that I would be totally occupied with surgery and recovery and didn’t had to think about anything else. But having this surgery also really freaked me out because of the history with my other leg. But that Thursday morning the doc decided that I was doing too good for emergency surgery, I was doing better than he expected considering the images. So starting with 6 weeks of intense rehab was the plan, physio 4 times a week in Amsterdam. I have been doing that and things are going well, rehab is going very well.

Two days after my doctors’ appointment I was back on the bike, the track bike, and I loved it. Maybe I wouldn’t be skiing but I could be biking and try to race the nationals, this gave me some peace and a goal. I need goals to function.

Working on goals; I also figured out a plan on how to deal with the gap in my medical school education. I decided I wanted to fill my gap with an extra research project, something that would contribute to my education rather than just waiting it out. I wanted to do the project within the field of pediatric oncology, remain in the same field as my Vancouver project, problem is that my hospital, LUMC, doesn’t have pediatric oncology. Trough Daniël I got some email addresses of doctor’s in the AMC hospital and I found a doctor who is happy to have me. I am really excited to start in January on a 6 month project.

The real rollercoaster started during the second week in the Netherlands. A friend from medical school passed away and that really caught me off guard, it was so shocking and sudden for me, and I really didn’t know how to deal with that. But I ended up talking about it a lot, with my mom and a mutual friend, normally I don’t talk about my feelings too much but now I did, showing that I changed? I don’t know, but what I do know is it helped.

Hardly over the first shock, a day after the devastating news I went to Landgraaf for the IPCAS races (international para ski races) to see my friends an watch the races. I had a lot of doubts surrounding this decision, would it be too hard on me, too much of a confrontation. Something that injured athletes deal with a lot. But I went and I can’t really say it was easy or the right decision, because to be honest it was hard on me and it left me completely exhausted. But it was nice to see everyone and hear the other girls, my competion, say how much the missed me. In things like this there probably isn’t a right or a wrong decision, it is a decision you have to make on the basis of what feels the best at the time. Anyway I decided that I rather wouldn’t walk away on something that might be too hard. Is that a change? Not really I have always been a fighter. But what I did find out and something that definitely has changed in me that I find peace in letting go of things I can’t change. I have been fighting a lot and it is good to fight for things that you believe in, but there is a point where you have to let go, how hard that might be. The last 6 months before Vancouver I have been fighting and holding on too much, I just couldn’t let go. In Vancouver I did let go and I got rid of all the anger inside me, being more forgiving, doesn’t mean I forget but it means that I freed myself from my anger.  And the basis for that I have found in just letting go, have peace in letting go of things you just can’t change, it doesn’t mean that you are defeated.

So yeah I am back in to my old life as a changed person, changes, sometimes subtle but still clearly there. All though old challenges are back as well and are still challenging, but I feel confident that I won’t fall back in to the pattern that I have lived for the 6 months leading up to my departure, a pattern that started a year ago. Vancouver was the best decision I have ever made and the timing worked out great. Being so far away and starting completely over is amazing an adventure and a chance, a chance that everybody should grab, I feel. We all get stuck in our patterns sometimes.  

Right now I find a lot of joy in track cycling, I have made a lot of progress and created some extra training opportunities. The 4 times a week physio schedule gives me some structure, so hopefully I will start writing my research paper soon.

The funeral was yesterday, it was a sad day, but I was happy to share it with friends, to drive up to Groningen together and share some stories.

This is the last post on this blog, for now. I am sure that I will return to Vancouver and have a reason to dust off this blog J.

The pictures are all in the different albums, there are a lot more pictures there then have been published in the blog, check it out under the tab pictures.

On a last note I would like to thank all my Vancouver friends for the great goodbye parties and gifts, both at work and in the Cambie. I miss you guys sooo much!!!! It was amazing and I will be back!!!!

 Selma, me, Mette

Mette, Chris, Me, Tina & Sherry

 Goodbye gift from my lab

Have a good winter!!!!

Grouse mountain

With only 2 weeks left I had one important thing left on my Vancouver bucket list, go up Grouse and watch the sunset.

Last Sunday we got treated with some awesome weather, the fog is gone!

So it was the ideal day to visit Grouse mountain, the peak of Vancouver.

I have been on Cypress mountain before, skiing, in February 2012, the view was one of the most amazing views I have ever seen, the Ocean, the mountains the city. I went night skiing that day so I watched the sunset and all the lights turn on, simply stunning.

But Grouse is a lot closer to the city, so the city view is better and it is easier to reach.

Around 2 pm Daniël and I met at Waterfront station, downtown Vancouver, to catch the sea bus north (also known as the cheapest ocean cruise ;)). On the North shore we took a bus directly to Grouse mountain. The total travel time from waterfront station was about 45 minutes, so not too bad.

We got one ticket for the gondola for free, because I was in the wheelchair, always nice.

We went up and visited the grizzly bears; Grinder and Coola.

Grinder

Grinder was found in 2001 in Invermere, BC. He was wandering alone on a logging road, dehydrated, thin, weak and weighing only 4.5 kg. His mother was never found so we’ll probably never know why he was alone. Grinder is outgoing and high-spirited. And he has established himself as the dominant bear despite his smaller size. If you see Grinder and Coola play fighting, you can bet he started it. 

Coola

In 2001, Coola was found orphaned on a highway near Bella Coola, BC. His mother had been killed by a truck and, of her three cubs, Coola was the only one to survive. Coola is an easygoing bear who’s content to let Grinder take the lead in new discoveries. He can usually be found submerged up to his neck in the large pond, carefully feeling around for his underwater 'bath toys' - a log, large bone and favourite rock. 

(http://www.grousemountain.com/wildlife-refuge)

The bears were at their fattest, close to hibernation state, all though we learned that day that bears don’t completely hibernate. They will be awake for about 15 minutes a day to do some grooming and bear yoga (so Vancouverite of them), on the other hand they won’t eat or go to the bathroom. Yep the bears were very cute and all.

We settled ourselves down on the patio with the best view ever to be ready for the sunset.

We watched some people finishing the Grouse grind, kind of an extreme hike, unfortunately not something that I would be able to do because it sounds so cool.

 The Grouse Grind

The Grouse Grind® is a 2.9-kilometre trail up the face of Grouse Mountain, commonly referred to as “Mother Nature’s Stairmaster.”

This trail is very challenging. Keep in mind that there is a wide range of mountaintop trails that might better suit the average hiker.

Length: 2.9 kilometres (1.8 miles) 

Elevation Gain: 853 metres (2,800 feet)
Base: 274 metres above sea level (900 feet)
Summit: 1,127 metres (3,700 feet)
Total Stairs: 2,830 

Statistics: Annually, over 100,000 people hike the trail.
Average Time: On average it takes up to an hour and a half to complete the hike. For novice hikers, two hours is recommended.
Participants: Hikers range in age from 7 to 90, with an equal male/female split.

(http://www.grousemountain.com/grousegrind)

Well anyway some people took their shirts off while they probably should have kept it on, people are trying to enjoy the view here ;).

Around 6pm the sun set, it was absolutely stunning, better in real life then pictures, but you try. (all pictures in album October)

After the sunset it cooled down pretty quick, and it wasn’t that warm to start with. So we took the gondola down.

 Another bus, seabus and another bus ride to go to Kits, we had a nice dinner at Selma’s place, Good way to finish the weekend.

Fogcouver

This past 9-10 days it has been Fogcouver. The city covered in a thick blanket of fog, totally in the spirit of Haloween ;). Well at least it is not raining and it allows for some pretty pictures, see this timelaps.

What I have learned from Vancouver weather so far, it is pretty unpredictable, but in any case the city is beautiful. 
On my last post I had a ton of pictures and stories to share, so this is it for now.
Exactly 25 weeks down and 16 days to go...

I will arrive at Schiphol on Monday November 11, 6.45pm.

Thanksgiving weekend

“Thanksgiving, or Thanksgiving Day (Canadian French: Jour de l'Action de grâce), occurring on the second Monday in October, is an annual Canadian holiday which celebrates the harvest and other blessings of the past year.” http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Thanksgiving_(Canada)

This past weekend was thankgiving long weekend in Canada, and I had a great time with friends.

On Saturday I went biking with Mette, Mette is Danish from Copenhagen and just like in the Netherlands the Danish have a big tradition of biking as way of transport. In Canada biking is mostly exercise but things are shifting more towards biking as way of transport. Although people are still sporty dressed on the bike and change  (or not, this is Vancouver) at work. Also helmets are mandatory.

We rented bikes at spokes, because they are renting handcycles. I still don’t have my own bike (after it got stolen) so this was the best solution, and so much fun.

We circled Stanley Park and went along the seawall towards Burrard bridge where we met up with Selma.

The three of us went around false creek and had lunch at Granville Island, after which Selma went back to Kitsilano. Me and Mette took the aquabus back to downtown and returned the bikes after 4,5 hours of biking fun. I have a lot more pictures, see album October at tab pictures.

That night I went to BBQ at a friends’ place together with 2 of my roommates. After the BBQ we headed to Stanley Park again, this time to go on the ghost train. October Halloween month. The ghost train was cute scary aka not scary at all, but they did a good job.

The pictures of this experience, iPhone pictures in the dark turned out bad but can be found in the album October.

On Sunday it was time for another traditional experience. We took the hour and a half drive to Abbotsford to go pumpkin and apple picking.

This was such a happy experience, the weather was awesome and smiles all around.

I went with; Linden, Angus, Kat and Martha. We all picked pumpkins at the pumpkin patch.

Then had to weigh them to see the price.

After that we took a quick look at the farm shop and went apple picking and eating… After three apples I was a bit sick ;). Anyway we picked 25ibs of apples so we have to do a lot of eating and baking.

And Monday was a day off because it was thanksgiving. We celebrated at Martha’s and Dylan’s place at English bay, enjoyed the great view.

Did some pumpkin carving.

And enjoyed an amazing dinner all home cooked by Martha. This first thanksgiving was a great experience. So thankful for new friends and new experiences that accompany my move to Canada. The bar for thanksgiving is incredible high for me now ;) special thanks to Martha and Dylan for their hospitality.

All pictures can be found in the album October, also some pictures from last weekend when me and Daniël went for a walk through Stanley Park to enjoy fall colors. And some random shots, enjoy.

Being a Vancouverite

After living in this great city for 20 weeks I’m completely over the touristy stuff (ok that has been a while), I have done most things and seen most of it. I don’t feel guilty for bunch watching a series with my roommate on a rainy weekend. When it’s not raining I still go outside a lot since the options are endless.

I’m not new in this city anymore, but being a Vancouverite. Lately there has been an article and a video on how to be a Vancouverite and I have to admit according to those I’m doing well ;) and they are quite accurate.

Kale-munching, yoga pant-wearing, seawall-running, Canuck-worshipping: Vancouver

Start saying “awesome” Check, awesome!

Fact: any conversation you have with a Vancouverite will include at least three “awesomes” and two “perfects.” If you want to really blend in, toss in the occasional “good times” and a “right on”.

Always be doing something healthy Check

Is the city motto: “Don’t walk if you can bike. Don’t bike if you can run. Don’t run if you can kayak”? I keep overhearing conversations like “So did you do that 150k bike ride? You did? Awesome!” So you’re all slender and gorgeous and healthy. You know that’s weird, right?

Wear Lululemon Check

I went to get kitted out at their Robson Street store. Never have I felt more like a Mean Brit. It was like a magnet for sunshine and happy people; basically, my nightmare. I got a cute top which turns into a minidress and some yoga pants. I challenged myself to walk through the West End wearing them — an act that would be greeted with suspicion and calls to the gendarmes in Paris where you don’t even put out your garbage without full makeup and a nifty suit. The last time I felt so exposed was walking to Brighton Pride dressed in a corset and frilly knickers. But I guess I looked the part as I got asked for directions.

Complain. A lot. Still not as bad as in the Netherlands

Whether you’re trash-talking the weather, moaning about Vancouver being an unfriendly city (while chatting warmly with me, a stranger!) or just grizzling about how no-fun the city is (always when you’re on your way to an exciting-sounding event) you lot love to whine. Is it because you live in paradise?

There’s life and there’s death and then there’s hockey Have to get in to that in my last 7 weeks

I’m told that to be a true Vancouverite is to be disappointed by the Canucks; I met the cute one at a bar opening and asked him for a photo for my friend’s kid. He said no. He was “busy” eating chips. Does that count? It was disappointing.

Embrace Yoga Check, and am flexible enough

Last week I went to my very first yoga class at Robson Street Yoga. I picked a class for “stiff people.” Turns out “stiff” in Vancouver means “not quite able to tuck your foot behind your ear.” In England it means “can barely touch toes.” I spent most of the class in red-mist rage at how un-stiff everyone was. Cheats! I liked the bit where you lie on the floor though. Is there a class for that?

Become kale-obsessed Check

Seriously, what is it with you lot and kale? OK, so it’s good for you. You can do a bunch of cool stuff with it from smoothies to sautéing it. It’s tasty and a pretty decent swap for chips and ... yeah, OK, I get it. Kale is er, awesome.

Stick to the rules Not quite there, call it the Dutch roots…

You love to hate your endless rules like no beer on the beach and the unfathomable madness of your liquor laws, but whenever I discuss this with Vancouverites they always end up in favour of the law. Know what? I think you kind of like being told what to do, you kinky lot.

Be a foodie Check

If it’s not seasonal, organic, free-range and local in this town it may as well be freaky lab-grown burger meat. Hanging out at Farmers’ Markets while planning to go to a Food Truck festival so you can discuss dinner plans is probably the No. 1

Vancouverite weekend occupation.

Go from Zen-like calm to fizzing, swivel-eyed rage in less than three seconds when asked about bike lanes Love the bike lanes, but I don’t drive and again Dutch thing.

I never knew Vancouverites could lose their cool over anything other than hockey until I discovered your “unreasonable argument” trigger. Sure, you all love cycling, just not if you have to lose car lanes to do it. I like to toss this one into conversation when things are getting too “awesome.”

So I’m blending in. Vancouver also has some nicknames which are funny to mention in this context; Hongcouver, yep half of the population is Asian. Raincouver and the Wet-coast, the weather during the summer has been exceptional good and dry but according to data it rains here 3 times as much as in Amsterdam, ohoh. No-funcouver this one only applies on the nightlife because for outdoor lovers there is plenty of fun, but nightlife pretty much sucks here, liquor is way too expensive, a patio closes at 11pm and most bars at 2am, on the other hand you can sleep enough to be active the next day.

My original return date was September 1, as you see I didn’t make that day, it was just too quick couldn’t deal with that. I have been asked what made me come to Vancouver, and it was something that I always wanted to do. But as it turns out the timing was exceptional good when I did. I needed that change. And that is the reason for a lot of people that moved to Vancouver. Moving abroad is something that you need to be ready for, it is scary it is exciting it is chance to (re)discover yourself, I haven’t been homesick one single day here, but I was so ready. I wasn’t happy with my life the last couple of months before I came out here, heartbroken after an important relationship generally not myself. So the answer I give when people ask me what made me make this leap is, ‘I needed a change’ and as it turns out it is a very true and acceptable answer since it goes for most 20 something people that move out here, and there we have another not as well-known nickname the city of broken hearts.

Off course 20 weeks have passed since, I’m healed and happy and enjoying everything here.

Check out this post of my friend Selma of Vancouver sunsets and see how amazing they are out here, I feel so lucky every day to live here, but since I’m over the touristy thing I was too lazy to make these pics myself ;) http://selmavh.blogspot.ca/2013/09/vancouver-sunsets.html

Because I stayed longer than originally planned I had to move out of my original room. I moved from UBC to yaletown, downtown. I’m really happy with this move, get to live with a new bunch of nice roommates. Get to experience living downtown, except for the fire station next door, but that is what earplugs are for, it has been awesome living downtown.

Some pics of my new room and neighborhood, oh and by the way I have my own en suite bathroom, love that!

Last weekend I went to homecoming with Selma at UBC, that was an experience. Just like the movies cheerleaders and a full stadion with over 3000 people, checkout the video I made for more pictures see the album September.

The new return date is November 10, I will arrive at Schiphol on November 11.

That’s it for now, sorry for the long post.

San Francisco 26-29 August 2013

A couple of weeks ago I was skyping with my friend from high school, Janneke, she told me about the trip she was going to make to San Francisco, and during the conversation the plan to meet each other there was born. I booked a roundtrip Vancouver San Francisco, just a good spontaneous plan. I booked the 6 am flight, what I regretted in the beginning because I needed to get up at 3am…. But well looking back now I’m happy I did that because it gave us an extra full day.

Monday August 26, my alarm rings in the middle of the night, oh crap have to get up. The cab picks me up at 3.30am and 20 minutes later I’m at YVR. The check in got a little nerve wrecking when turned out that I needed an ESTA, the green form that I got on the US border last time, which was still valid was only for land border crossing, Americans….

Anyway personal at the airport had clearly dealt with this one before and within 5 minutes I had my ESTA and was ready to go. No checked bags so moving on to security, shit a water bottle in my bag, well decided to drink it all. Next step was the border crossing, I was quite surprised that this happened still in Vancouver but it would make my arrival a lot quicker. Damn those north American and especially the US border crossings are nerve wrecking, serious interrogation shit, what are you going to do, who are you meeting, where are you staying, how do you know each other etc. After leaving all my prints and what must be a very charming picture, I was welcomed in the United states of America at 4.30am. Time for coffee, after that everything went smooth, plane left on time, slept a bit and landed in San Francisco at 8.20.

It was so nice to see Janneke again after 4 months, we went to the city and did some, or a lot of shopping. The whole Victoria secret experience and very touristy the cable car.

We were lucky with the cable car because it wasn’t that busy at the point where we got on, from that time on we only saw extreme lines at the cable cars. The first one wouldn’t take us because of the wheelchair, but like 2 minutes later another one arrived which was empty so we got the best spots.

For more pictures check the tab pictures and the album San Francisco.

Tuesday, we went to Alcatraz! Alcatraz was really impressive. We did the audio tour and walked around the island a bit. The audio tour was pretty good and gave a lot of background information. I could write a lot about it but pictures say more, both of us agreed that this was definitely a highlight of our trip.

Wednesday, Golden Gate bridge, like serious tourists we couldn’t skip out on this guy. Well turns out the Golden Gate bridge was a lot further from downtown then both of us expected. After trying to find a bus we decided to cab there.  It was sunny and hot downtown but once we arrived at the bridge we found out that the lonely planet was speaking the truth about the need for warm clothes. Like the usual the bridge was covered in fog and it was windy. We crossed the bridge by foot took a lot of pictures along the way  and tried not to get killed by the bikes. Once we reached the other side it was sunny again, strange weather…. We walked around the lookout spot, taking more pics, we were serious tourists. Then we looked for a bus to bring us back, but there was none, we even asked those hideous hop on hop off busses, those are seriously expensive. So anyway we walked back, the fog had disappeared now, so a new view on the bridge. We took the bus to Fisherman’s Warf and figured we deserved a good lunch after all that walking. After lunch we shopped some more and called it a day.

Thursday, our last day… Turned out Janneke’s flight left from a different airport then mine did, we had brunch together before our ways parted at noon. Weird to say goodbye and fly home to two completely different spots on the world. But it was so nice to meet up in San Francisco, see you back in the Netherlands Janneke! I had a great trip with you, celebrating our 10 year of being friends anniversary ;) ok so we only figured that out when we were there. I had 2 hours by myself, went looking for sea salt taffies for one of my friends in Vancouver, the mile and a half stroll to the store was pretty interesting, it took me by the UN plaza among other things. Back at union square I bought a pair of jeans, can’t resist those American prices and they are really good. And hopped on the train to the airport. My plane was delayed by an hour because of bad weather in Vancouver, oh oh. Yep Vancouver welcomed me with rain, after sunny California I didn’t had a coat, luckily I made it home before the thunder storm started.

Janneke thanks for the great trip! And Teddy thanks for the hospitality of having me stay at your place and showing us some good restaurants. Also thank your mom for taking us out for dinner on Wednesday, it was really good.